Q: How did you get the name Wheezy?
A: There was a character on “The Jeffersons,”an old sit-com, whose name was Louise, but her husband called her Wheezy. I go by the name Louise, but thanks to a forgetful midwife in Mississippi, the name on my birth certificate is Ree.
Q: How many languages do you speak?
A: Three. English is my first language and I can hold my own in both French and Spanish
Q: If Ramona is your only child and she has no children, how did you manage to have a grandson?
A: Jeremy’s mom is a very close family friend who decided to build a family through adoption. Although he has gone from calling me Gramma Lou to calling me Grams over the years, my love for him will never change. Legally and emotionally he is my grandson and I try to spoil him accordingly.
Q: What are floppies?
A: Natural breasts.
Q: What is a cougar?
A: A woman who prefers younger men.
Q: What is that body cleansing diet you and Ramona talk about?
A: Some people call it the “lemonade diet.” It is a fast from the book, “The Master Cleanser,” by Stanley Burroughs. My sister Ada and I swear by it. Lots of health food stores have the book and you can get it by going to www.amazon.com as well.
Q: What is that stuff you spray in hotel rooms to keep bugs and germs at bay?
A: It is Eucalyptus liniment that I order from www.eucolife.com
Q: What is U.S.D.A. cougar meat?
A: An irresistible younger man who can be identified as Undeniably Sexy and Downright Appetizing!
Q: What qualifies a man as cougar meat?
A: His ability to attract a cougar of course!
Q: Where do you get your material?
A: From listening to your calls to the Matt and Ramona Show and watching you chase your children in Walmart.
Q: Who qualifies as a Q-Tip?
A: Anyone who has lots of gray hair. Gray roots count too!